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In A Nutshell

Natural Hair Ain’t Easy. I Know! But Now It’s Handled.

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Approx. 3 min read

At the age of four the song “Chutney Bacchanal” by Trinidad’s Chris Garcia was permeating through the airwaves. I loved that song and the man with ‘the hair’ behind it. (I wanted hair that silky – so long and flowing).

By the age of six, I was travelling frequently with my family to the States. I lived for the excitement associated with visiting a different country – the packing, the airports and the journey. But my highlight back then was interacting with the flight attendants. These slender beauties with well made up faces and long flowing hair. (Oh, the hair!)

Fast forward to the age of seven and my mother began a series of two-strand twists with a semblance too close to her own locs, much to the displeasure of the religious primary school I was attending. Needless to say, after one note too many, she visited the school and that was the last time I saw the building.

By the age of eight, during my playtime, I adorned my crown with t-shirts and modelled my way through our home garden. The plants and flowers would clap as I ripped the gravel runway.

Around age 10, I was of the strong belief that ‘straight’ was better and the bathroom sink saw me every 6 weeks resisting the burning of that ‘pink stuff’ as I battled my way to shoulder-length hair.

On the other side of S.E.A was a sea of girls dressed in uniforms and varying hairstyles. To be mixed meant you were favoured for that “good hair” and I was disqualified from that race a long time ago when my parents met. So braids became a thing.

But at age 12, between the stress of maintaining extensions and power-pointing the importance of keeping up with the latest hair trends to my non-negotiable parents, I opted to join my mother on her loc journey.

For the next 14 years of my life I would fall madly in love with my hair. I’d admit I started locs for all the wrong reasons. But something about those tightly woven strands made me feel powerful. It became my identity and I embraced it fully. I would be known as ras, rasta barbie, loc queen and every other derivation of the word. My locs were me and I – it.

This would all come to a crashing halt at the age of 26 when a dye touch up resulted in weekly hair shedding rituals. I camped in denial for months. Thinning locs that no potion of oil and prayers could save. In a panic I remember reaching out to a loctician and her words echoed throughout my body, “You have to cut it in order to save it”.

Here I was scissors in hand as the blonde boulders tumbled down in my near Sampson moment. I would have given anything at that point to return to the moment right before that last dye appointment. The irony of dye literally killing my hair. Somewhere in there was a life lesson that I would learn over the next two years.

I had to sit with myself, sit beside myself , sit and face myself in the mirror and grow to accept, like, then love what I saw looking back at me. This did not come easy and on top of that, I had to figure out what to do with my hair!

So many options, and I had no clue where to begin. Unsure of what could work and what couldn’t, I stumbled upon ‘Hub for Natural Hair.’

This subscription based gift box was a way for me to test out different hair products monthly. I’ve had so much fun with this new journey of growth. And I think having the opportunity to be guided in this way helped boost my confidence. So whether I’m rocking my afro, a twist out or curls – my identity , my strength doesn’t come from the style I choose, but from me. And as the song says , ‘I am not my hair , I am not this skin but I am the soul that lives within’.

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In A Nutshell

‘Sis’ is Tired! I am Sis. Who are You? It’s Time to Fix That.

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Approx. 2 min read

Sometimes in this beautiful process of healing and growth, we may think that we’ve overcome a particular challenge, learnt all the lessons and are ready for the next level. Then, life may come along and test us to see if we’ve truly evolved, or if more work is needed.  

Honestly, in that moment we may feel so defeated, but please know that that’s only a feeling.           For some time now, I’ve been doing the work on myself, spending that quality time with myself, doing therapy, speaking kindly to myself, looking in the mirror and liking what I see , ending situations with people and things that no longer serve me, pushing toward my goals and all of that, so I figured that I was well on my way to “perfecting” this self-love thing. Right?

Truth is, self love isn’t a course that you complete and graduate from. It’s a living breathing thing. It’s an everyday thing. It isn’t always pretty. It requires work and forgiveness and holding yourself accountable for shortcomings and errors; But also giving yourself grace and second chances to do better. 

Loving yourself also means taking care of you. Not just the external ‘you’ that dresses up and goes out, but the ‘you’ that juggles emotions, decisions and has to focus on so many things at the same time. The ‘you’ that has to deal with loss, death and disappointment.  The ‘you’ that needs rest, that requires peace of mind and simply an ease up at times.

I thought I was “handling” all these things well. But the truth is I’ve been frustrated, tired and drained. Not only by the uncertainty of the times we’re in due to the pandemic, but also by the overwhelming pressure from social media, the continuous loss of loved ones and so much more. I’ve been feeling like I’m not hitting the targets I set out to accomplish daily, but then it hit me! I realized that it wasn’t because I was demotivated or because I was procrastinating – It was simply because, ‘sis is tired!’

It’s crazy to think that all this time I’ve been running on an empty tank , falsely believing that I didn’t need to take a break, telling everyone else that they should, but not giving myself permission to pause. So from next week I am hitting the snooze button on life for a bit and scheduling much needed time to spend with loved ones, but also ample amounts of rest and self care.

First up on the list is a spa day. And what better way to ‘spa on a budget’ than with Cheveu Beauty Secret. They have these compact gift boxes with just the right products to take care of yourself from head to toe-hair products, facial masks, a wonderful detox mask for your feet and much more. I’m so looking forward to pampering myself with this package from the comfort of my home. I deserve this ‘me time’ and so do you.

Have a safe and enjoyable Christmas and remember to take time to rest because there is only one you!

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In A Nutshell

Did Your Mom Give You The ‘Outside Clothes’ Talk Too?

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If you were raised in a household like mine, with a mother who had slight OCD tendencies, then you would be familiar with the phrase, “don’t sit on the bed with your outside clothes!”

In fact, anytime you’d visit someone’s home, much to their confusion, you’d raise the sheet/chair covering before sitting or sit on the edge of the seat or mattress. Am I right? No? Just me? Okay…

Needless to say, I’m familiar with having to sanitise my hands, change my clothes after returning from ‘outside,’ but, it’s never been mandatory up until now.

When the pandemic first surfaced , we were told of all the ways we could protect ourselves from being infected. I just had not considered how this change would impact our lifestyle. Gone are the days of coming home and being greeted at the front door with hugs and conversations with loved ones, or going straight to the kitchen after a long day of work to get a head start on preparing dinner. No. The welcome home greeting mat has now been replaced with a sanitization station. And there are Covid protocols governing how we operate on the “inside” of our homes. 

At the very notice of a sniffle or the faintest cough, an onslaught of questions arise and the rest of the household slightly distances itself, as a precautionary measure. This feeling of helplessness, which stems from the fear of getting the virus, is daunting to say the least. 

Not being able to embrace, touch or move as we’ve been used to, is strange, and I’m not sure how long this ‘coldness’ may have to last, but one thing I do know is that we cannot allow ourselves to become emotionally disconnected, as much as this time calls for social distancing. For this particular reason, I’m super grateful for the team at Zee’s Cleaning Supplies. To be honest, they’ve made this process a lot easier to handle. Among their wide range of household cleaning products, the team offers the ultimate Sanitization combo. This package has everything you need to sanitize your living/work space on a daily basis at an affordable price. Plus, you can order online and have it delivered straight to you.

With this level of convenience, I get back time, which I can spend at home with loved ones while ensuring that we continue to maintain the cleanliness needed to combat this virus. 

Check out their offers so you can continue to check in with your loved ones.

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MONDAY MADNESS IS COMING!

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YOU DESERVE TO PLAY MAS TOO.

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WE ARE GOING TO BREAKFAST IS…

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