Oh! The Sh*t I’ve Been Through…BUT, Ever Realized Gratitude Tastes Alot Like Ice Cream?

There was a point in time when I had nothing. Barely enough for food, struggling for money to cover monthly expenses, and I felt absolutely alone.

Back then I was bitter. Angry about my living situation and filled with so much unforgiveness towards the people that I felt put me there. I would cry myself to sleep- sleep away the hunger. And in the mornings I would wake up thinking “God, why am I still here?”

I genuinely felt like my presence on earth was not needed, and that for whatever reason God was probably keeping me alive for comic relief. Like I said, it was an emotionally dark space, a mentally frustrating place, and there seemed to be no way out.

The only thing that gave me a sense of purpose and made me feel like I belonged, was work. There I had co-workers who eventually became some of my really good friends. Though I was extremely private and kept a lot of my struggles to myself, they were always encouraging and supportive with their words toward me. In many ways I think that without those friendships I may not have been able to survive those trying times.

One night I recall that things got really bad and I felt like I was truly forsaken. I remember shouting to the heavens, “I have nothing – nothing at all!”

Those words echoed throughout my apartment, but it felt like a dagger straight to my heart and I kept mulling over the statement – ‘I had nothing? Nothing?’… I looked around and started making mental note of the things that were in front of me.

I had shelter. I had a job to pay for the shelter. I had a fridge – empty, small but a fridge nonetheless. And that night I stayed up listing out all the things that I had, including the friendships. I realised that there were people who cared about me, who knew I existed and were actually happy that I was around.

That night and many many nights after that, I made a list, which I now know is a gratitude list, identifying all the things that I had, that I was grateful for.

This new way of operating changed me. Though my problems still existed I began to see them differently – not as dead-ends but as things that I could work through and overcome, with time.

You see, I had to learn gratitude in the midst of my lack. I had to become grateful for what I did have and not focus on all the things that I didn’t. I had to count my blessings even when I felt like I wasn’t one.

I started thinking about things that would cheer me up, like what I would buy if I had money. What food would make me feel good. And it was always ice cream.

To me gratitude is alot like ice cream.

When ice cream is at a particular temperature it’s cold and hard but once the temperature changes , it defrosts and makes for a delicious treat.

Likewise, the situation that we’re in may be tough and have us cold, angry and even bitter, but once we change the way we view things the situation looks a lot different – more manageable.

To this day ice cream is still my favourite treat. And thanks to the beautiful couple behind the Trinidad and Tobago brand, Milk and Honey Ice Cream I can enjoy this dessert as often as I like. It’s delicious and affordable.

I like my ice cream in abundance and I’ve learnt that in abundance there is gratitude.